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TRAINING LINK


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FRIDAY MADNESS (by request from AMANDA)
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Howdy BKNers, a bit of Friday Madness

Inquisitive Chinese students always prefer to enrol at the University of East Anglia.

It's their insatiable thirst for Norwich.

Just heard on the news that a midget had his wallet stolen.

Who would stoop so low?

 

Dave



-- Edited by TRAINING LINK on Friday 1st of March 2013 05:39:11 AM

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Shamus


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Is this the start of bad joke Friday!

Right, here's my offering....

Ever wonder....

..why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
..why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
..why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
..why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
..why doctors call what they do "practice"?
..why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows?
..why lemon juice is made with artificial flavour, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
..why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
..why there isn't mouse-flavoured cat food?
..why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
..why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
..why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
..why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
..why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?



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Shaun

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Spamkebab


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banned.gif

  



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Amanda


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Very good Dave, although last weeks one was better!

Hope this is going to be a weekly thing!

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Amanda
Rhianrach


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I know a good joke but it's a bit rude evileye



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Steve
TRAINING LINK


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Lol Steve, I know loads of rude ones but probably wouldnt go down too well with the ladies!

Dave

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Rhianrach


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I suppose Shaun could always delete them if they weren't deemed suitable :)

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Steve
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Come on then....let's have them!

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Pauline
TRAINING LINK


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Oh Pauline if only I could, as I am representing a company I have to be careful about what I post, but I would love to tell you the one about a bloke who goes to a bald barber and asks him if he has any advice or tips for hair growth, its hillarious but oh so rude and Shaun would delete it and I would lose the iota of respect I have on here lol.

Dave

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Shamus


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What respect? lol... Just joshin matey.

boring fudy duddy that I am, the criteria have to be...

No racism or sexism, basically nothing that can upset any other members (says the person who called someone a dancing monkey on the site)

And we should all now watch this anti sexism video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTKm7pYYE-4

Apparently my son thinks that I am actually Douglas Reynholm in disguise.

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Shaun

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Rhianrach


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Ok in for a penny and all that ............

So a bloke walks into a bar and orders ten shots of whisky .............. actually no it might offend thinking on :)

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Steve
Amanda


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No carry on Steve, I could do with a laugh!!!!



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Amanda
Rhianrach


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So the barman lays out the shots and one by one the man throws them back.
The barman can't help but wonder so he asks the man "why the ten shots has something happened"
The man says "I just had my first BJ"
So the barman congratulates him and offers him the next drink on the house.
The man looks at him and says "Nah your alright, if those ten can't get rid of the taste another isn't going to help".

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Steve
Amanda


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Brilliant Steve, it was worth waiting for!!!!! I just laughed out loud good job the kids are in bed!




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Amanda
Spamkebab


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I have now moved over to AWeb sprint.gif



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Rhianrach


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Amanda wrote:

Brilliant Steve, it was worth waiting for!!!!! I just laughed out loud good job the kids are in bed!


 So did I when I first heard it smile



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Steve
Rhianrach


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Spamkebab wrote:

I have now moved over to AWeb sprint.gif

 Awww don't go, it's not a true story.



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Steve
Spamkebab


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Morning Steve, i wondered when you would sneak out of your hole lol.

Talk about lowering the tone, we should all be typing in Bass.

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Stardoe


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Lol...excellent Steve

How do you type in Bass Neil?

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Pauline
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With ear muffs Pauline

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Shamus


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Damn it all Dave. And I'd just gone out and bought two large fish to slap the keyboard with.... Which of course could only have improved my spelling!

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Shaun

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Amanda


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I've just found this one on the internet, thought it was right up everyone's street!


'Accountants are the best lovers. They can do it all night long and keep their balance'!

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Amanda
Spamkebab


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What? is the forum overpopulated? is this how you guys create mass migration?

Amanda, Your Horse pic joke was cool, this one = not so cool lol.


Yours despairingly

Neil

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TRAINING LINK


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Shamus wrote:

Damn it all Dave. And I'd just gone out and bought two large fish to slap the keyboard with.... Which of course could only have improved my spelling!

 Hope they were SEABASS Shaun, if not you have been done like a kipper lol!



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TRAINING LINK


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Amanda wrote:

I've just found this one on the internet, thought it was right up everyone's street!


'Accountants are the best lovers. They can do it all night long and keep their balance'!

 I heard they charge by the minute? lol



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Amanda


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HI Neil,

I agree the horse one is the best.

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Amanda
ADAS


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TRAINING LINK wrote:

 I heard they charge by the minute? lol

not to mention experts in double-entry



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Tony

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TRAINING LINK


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ADAS wrote:
TRAINING LINK wrote:

 I heard they charge by the minute? lol

not to mention experts in double-entry

 Now that was clever and made me laugh

Dave



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