The Champion of the consumer is back by popular demand with Friday Fun
One fine morning in the Garden of Eden, God looked down upon Adam and noticed that he was looking glum. So the Lord said to Adam "What troubles you, my Son?"
Adam looked up to God and said "I'm lonely, Father. I have no one to talk to."
So God said "Then I shall give you a companion, and she will cook and clean for you, and wash your clothes. She shall bear your children and never wake you in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will give you love and compassion whenever you want it. She will not nag at you, and will always be the first to admit she is wrong if you two ever disagree. She will love and support you no matter what, and always agree with any important decision you make. She shall be called a 'woman.'
Intrigued, Adam asked God "What shall this woman cost, Father?"
God replied "One arm and one leg, my son."
Adam pondered this question for a minute, and with the seriousness that only comes from complete certainty, he answered... "Hmm, what can I get for just a rib?"
The rest is history.
Little Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Johnny?"
"My goldfish died," replied Johnny tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbour was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"
Johnny patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your friggin cat."
