Well I couldn't let Christmas Eve come without some corny festive fun now could I?
What beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake? Tarzipan !
What did the eskimos sing when they got there Christmas dinner ? "Whalemeat again, don't know where, don't know when " !
Whats happens if you eat the Christmas decorations ? You get tinsel-itus !
What do you get when you cross a bell with a skunk? Jingle smells!
What do you call an old snowman?
Water
Father Christmas: Doctor, Doctor I feel so unfit Doctor: You need to go to an elf farm
Doctor, Doctor I'm scared of Father Christmas Doctor: You're suffering from Claus-trophobia.
An honest politician, a kind and giving Accountant and Santa Claus were walking down the street and saw a £20 note. Which one picked it up? Santa! The other two don't exist!
How long does it take to burn a candle down? About a wick !
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas ? It's Christmas, Eve !